it's finally Easter again! for me, it's the best day of the whole year. the resurrection of Jesus is the best thing that ever happened for all of us, whether you admit it or not. it is the single greatest act of love that has ever been given; it gave us access to the very throne of heaven. imagine!! this is the day when the Creator of everything we can see and so much that we can't stepped out and claimed me, once and for all. His heart beat for me that day. He gave Himself up for me. what then can i offer in return but all i have?
a pastor once told me that he used Easter as his new year, and it's stuck with me. there's nothing too special about january 1. sure, we hang a new calendar and write a different date on our checks, but is that really significant? not for me. Easter, on the other hand, is the day that everything became new again. this is the day where our slates are wiped clean, the origin of everything in my life that's good.
so as i stand here today, looking back over the last year, i see how far God has taken me. it's been a rough year, to say the least. but now i can see pieces of why some things happened the way they did. i needed to break. so He broke me, pretty completely. but in that brokenness came such a beautiful surrender! i wish there were words for me to explain it to you. i've finally surrendered myself to what He made me to be. i found myself, who i really am, in Him. right there, where i thought i'd looked a million times. i'd always grazed right over it before. but this year, He showed me, put me in a situation where i HAD to see it. and now i have this incredible, indescribable freedom in this surrender.
don't get me wrong, i'm definitely still a work in progress. just how this surrender is going to play out is still very much up in the air, and some days it's all i can do to hold on to that faith that He's still in control. but if you had told me last year that this is where i would be today, that the things that have happened in my life would be happening, i'm pretty sure i wouldn't have believed you. but i think i'm happy here. as scary, confusing, exhilerating, and transient as my current situation is, i know it's in line with who God made me to be, and i wouldn't trade it for anything. it took a lot, but i made definite progress this year. because of God's relentless pursuit of me (me!), i have grown. how thankful i am for His love!
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